


Let My Hope Grow Cold And Atrophy

by nazgularepeopletoo



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Abandonment, Angst, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Pre-Eye Elias, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-24
Updated: 2020-03-24
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:28:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23290039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nazgularepeopletoo/pseuds/nazgularepeopletoo
Summary: Peter wasn’t expecting the house to be dark when he got back from his latest voyage. It was though, even though he knew for a fact Elias shouldn’t have been out.
Relationships: Elias Bouchard/Peter Lukas
Comments: 4
Kudos: 26





	Let My Hope Grow Cold And Atrophy

Peter wasn’t expecting the house to be dark when he got back from his latest voyage. It was though, even though he knew for a  _ fact _ Elias shouldn’t have been out. It wasn’t like there was anywhere for him to go except work and occasionally downtown. He didn’t usually go downtown alone, though, and Peter had done his best to keep him alone. So it was with a frown of confusion he let himself in through the front door to the darkened entryway. 

Elias was there, he could tell. He could feel it from the entryway, the intense wave of despair that permeated the house, tinged with just a hint of fresh rain. The Eye was rubbing off on him more and more, it seemed. He smiled, waiting to see if Elias knew he was there for a moment before going deeper into the house, following the familiar path to the bedroom they shared. It was as quiet as it was dark, so Peter knew that Elias could hear his footsteps.  _ He _ wasn’t exactly being quiet. 

When he reached the bedroom door, he paused, pressing his ear against it, listening intently. Ah yes, there it was. The near silent sound of crying being muffled by a pillow. He listened for just a bit longer before finally cracking the door open, giving Elias plenty of time to pull himself together. It came as a surprise then when he entered and Elias had presumably not moved, curled up near the head of the bed, legs tangled in the blankets and face pressed into the fabric. His chest was heaving, and his face was tearstained. 

“Elias, dear?” Peter’s voice took on a worried tone, and he moved towards the edge of the bed slowly. “Elias what’s wrong?” The smaller man didn’t respond until Peter sat on the bed, reaching out to place a hand on his ankle. Then he jerked up into a sitting position, yanking his leg away from Peter. 

“Don’t you  _ fucking _ touch me. Don’t you dare.” Elias’ voice wavered, but he managed to keep it from cracking for now. His eyes were wide behind the glasses sitting skewed on his nose, the odd tear or two dripping out of his eyes. Anger burned behind the tears, and he could see the small man shaking. Peter feigned shock, though it wasn’t fully fake. He’d expected anger and hurt but he hadn’t quite expected it like this. 

“Elias what’s going on?” He moved further onto the bed, almost effectively trapping Elias against the headboard. “Darling please talk to me, what’s wrong.”

The fight went out of Elias almost immediately, replaced with a fresh wave of tears. He hiccupped, raising a hand to his face to try and wipe away the tears. He squeezed his eyes shut, taking deep breaths, flinching when Peter’s large hand settled on his knee. When he finally reopened them, he slumped, hugging himself. 

“Why…? Why Peter?” He didn’t wait for Peter to respond before shaking his head, cutting him off. “Did I…?” Sniffing, he sat forward, leaning more into Peter’s space. “Did I do something?” Peter blinked at him for a moment, processing his words. Then he  _ laughed _ . Elias jerked back again, expression morphing from shock to pain to rage and back.

“Did you do something? No, dear, you didn’t do anything. Quite the opposite, actually. You’ve been perfect for me.” He reached out, catching Elias’ chin in his hand and gripping it tightly. Elias gasped, twitching but otherwise not struggling, not yet. “Everything is going just fine. Look at you. You’re flourishing like this.” That was when Elias snapped. 

Bringing up his hands, he shoved Peter as hard as he could, grunting as his jaw was pulled hard before the hand released from around him. He scrambled off the bed, hovering a foot away with tears of anger threatening to spill over his already tear stained face. His hands were raised weakly, ready to strike but almost unwilling to. He’d never raised a hand against Peter, and vise versa, but he was this close to doing something terrible. 

“Flourishing? You think I’m flourishing, Peter? I’m  _ miserable _ ! I’ve barely gotten out of bed all week and you have the  _ audacity _ …” He trailed off when it was obvious Peter wasn’t going to retaliate, crossing his arms over his chest. “Where have you been? Your voyage was supposed to end three weeks ago.  _ Where have you been? _ ” Peter stood, forcing Elias to take a step back as he loomed over him. 

“I had business to attend to. There was no way of letting you know.”

“Oh  _ bullshit _ , you know that’s not true. You’ve gotten me messages from fucking everywhere before. Are you having an affair? Do you not love me anymore?  _ What did I do to deserve this, Peter?? _ ” 

Enough was enough. This wasn’t worth the pleasure of feeding off of him, especially now, when he was so isolated. Maybe when he was more intuned with The Eye he would be more bearable to deal with. In one motion Peter moved forward, looping an arm through Elias’ and pulling, unbalancing the smaller man. Elias yelped, fighting to get his balance back and failing. He clawed at Peter’s arm still protected by his thick wool coat as he was literally drug through the house and dumped at the front door.

“I’d like it if you left, Elias.” He pulled his wallet out of his pocket, counting out a stack of bills as Elias stared up at him with wide eyes, mouth moving soundlessly. “You’re too dramatic right now, and I’m very tired from my voyage, so I would  _ really _ appreciate it if you weren’t here. Whining about how lonely you are after everything I’ve done for you.” He dropped the money on Elias’ lap dismissively. “When you’ve found a flat I’ll have your things sent over.”

The entryway was dead silent for a moment, neither men moving. Peter broke the tension by folding his arms, pushing at some of the bills that had fallen on the floor with his foot.

“Peter… Peter wait I…” Elias swallowed, absently gathering the money off of his lap and clutching it tightly in one damp hand. “Peter I’m sorry don’t… please don’t I can… I w-won’t complain anymore please.” He’d pushed himself onto his knees, grabbing for Peter’s coat with his free hand, bringing it up to his face. “Peter please I love you-”

“Enough, Elias.” Gently, Peter pried his coat out of Elias’ grip. “Please just go, I don’t want to have to involve the police.” He did wince when Elias sobbed, dropping back to the floor. “I’ll give you an hour. If you’re not gone by then I’ll be forced to take steps.” With that he turned on his heel and walked away, leaving the man he loved broken in the entryway, a single stab of pain twinging his heart. 

It wouldn’t be long before he’d net Elias again, he could feel it. A man like that would be desperate for affection in a few months time, but he would wait until he was fully integrated to lure him in. Humming quietly to himself, he went into the kitchen, flipping on the lights. He could really go for a bottle of wine right about now. Yes, that sounded like the perfect end to this already tediously long day.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from The Crane Wives song "October"
> 
> I'm only on episode 100 pls no spoilers!


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